Every relationship comes with challenges and opportunities. Of all, the long-distance relationships are the most difficult to maintain especially when it is with youngsters who are yet to experience all facets of life. Teenagers or those in their early twenties in college go through a lot of hormonal changes and coupled with that to experience the struggle of maintaining long distance relationships can be overwhelming. However, this is not an impossible feat or a rocket science. Here are some long-distance relationship tips to help one overcome this trouble and also convert it into an opportunity to grow as a couple and as an individual.
Things to do in Long distance relationship:
1. Use Technology :
Staying connected is easier today than it has ever been. Using various social as well as personal technological inventions can help give almost a real time experience. Well nothing can be same as the in person experiences but much can be achieved using webcams, teams calls, skype calls etc. It makes it easier to connect while seeing the expressions and looking into the eyes while one communicates.
● To further the cause, dress up well when you are coming over the call, just as you would do when you would have gone to meet in person.
● Keep up the times and the dates which you have planned online, so that your partner still feels important and realizes that you are still interested in spending time together and distance has not taken the two of your apart.
● Don’t fight over emails. It is always better to speak out during the video sessions than fighting over emails as it is easy to misinterpret the finer emotions and miss out on the body language. Also take it up during the middle of the session, not in the starting as that will spoilt the whole session and not at the end, as there will be no time left for patch-up and for moving ahead.
2. Plan Visits :
The once in a while visits can keep up the spark and be refreshing for the relationship. However make sure that these are not a burden for either of you. Hence plan them out so that the visits do not become demanding and both of you are able to look forward to them. Also make sure that even while you make an impromptu visit, you take into consideration whether your projects, classes or your partner’s priorities are not disturbed.
3. Maintain Communication :
Have consistent communication, through phones, chats, messages etc. Regular communication just as you would have if your were together. That would keep both of you updated and will prevent the risk of drifting away which is the biggest danger of long distance relationships. Thus communication is the key thing needed to have a long distance relationship working.
4. Cement the gaps and strengthen the strengths :
What we mean here is that spend some time in thinking and identifying what are the weak points that are jeopardizing the relationships and what you can do to cement the gaps. Also one of the cementing material could be to use your existing strengths in your relationships, examples things that you both mutually enjoy talking, or discovering.
5. Be supportive of your partner’s needs in their ‘Other’ life:
The very reason that you are distances apart is some pressing need that needs to be fulfilled, example education, or job or a care need etc. Support your partner in that need and be a part of the solution building process. Take active participation into their projects by regularly giving/ seeking suggestions, listening to them, asking relevant questions and taking genuine interest in those priorities and doing whatever is possible for you to support your partner in their endeavors.
6. Handle romantic temptations :
One to the things to do in a long distance relationship is managing romantic temptations. While it is not required to feel guilty about enjoying your life on or off campus but it is important to identify the romantic temptations that one might feel while interacting with members of the opposite gender. One cannot be immune to them but those in committed relationships take the effort to identify the negatives in those temptations to keep them at bay and instead focus and envision the good times that they spend with their partners. But if you still feel regular attachments to somebody then it is time to think, whether you are moving away from your relationship and why ?
7. Keep Expectations realistic :
It is important to realize that your partner and you are miles away and hence, should know what is possible for you or your partner to do for the other. Realistic expectations can keep fights away and helps in not putting undue pressure on each other. This goes both ways , understand what is possible for them and in the same way let them realize what is possible for you.
8. Stay Busy :
Staying busy keeps mind off unwanted fears, depressive thoughts and insecurities. It also gives opportunity to focus on the task at hand. Use this time effectively to develop your self through courses or doing things that you would have always wanted to do. Hang out with friends, visit the library, do joint studies, references, occasional partying etc. Also realize that college is a big stepping platform of life. The relationship may or may not go past this hence it is important not to loose the primary focus of being in the college. Ensure that you use time judiciously in your college work and do not spend too much time over calls etc. Enjoy the on-campus life of the college as well as it is one of the experiences that will not come back again once lost.
We hope that you will find these long-distance relationship advice useful and will give you answers to questions on how to deal with long distance relationship in college as well as in other phases of life.